Respect

I had just made my upgrade to Captain at the airline where I was working.  I forget where I was, what I was doing and who I was working with.  But what happened really affected me the rest of my life.  I was engulfed in paperwork and doing my new "Captain" stuff.  We were finished and there was a tradition that I wasn't quite prepared to handle. 

When pushing back and all is well, the Captain and ground crew give a salute to each other.  On this occasion it went down just a bit differently.  You see, this was my first trip as Captain.  The entire ground crew lined up on the tarmac and every one of them saluted me.  I saluted back. 

Words cannot describe the feelings that came over me.  The respect that given was quite life changing.  I take my job as Captain, pilot in command very seriously.  Very seriously.  Mind you, I have made many mistakes, but I did my best to assure that my crew and myself always were able to come home, safely. 

I don't know why, but I am compelled to tell another story that really piggy back's this story.  It happened just today.  I was at work and this kid, I say kid, but he is in his twenties.  Anyway, this kid was sitting at a computer station with two computers.  He is in a role at work that is lesser known, not of lesser importance, but a support role.  I came up to the computer station and asked if he was using one of the computers, and if he minded if I used the one computer.  He laughingly stated that I shouldn't ask, but tell him that I was going to use the computer.  I told him that it was a respect issue.  He looked at me funny like.  I know he has a job to do.  I know that it is not a lead role.  That does not diminish him as an individual tho.  As I left, I told him "Dude, you gotta give respect in order to receive it".  He had that look of someone who was deep in thought.  Mission accomplished.

Why is respect so important?  Why is respect so important to me?  Good question.  I think it was my upbringing.  My parents instilled this in me.  But, lets go one step further.  I believe that respect is good to give, but you have to give the right kind of respect.  I know, I know, the right kind?  Another one word topic is perception.  I can give you a salute all day long, but if this is something that you don't recognize or see as a sign of respect then the respect that I give you is heard with deaf ears.  Get it?  I try to go one step further and would like to know what you see as someone showing you respect. 

Mind you, I am a work in progress.  I am working on this with the women in my life.  I have only figured one thing out tho.  I have a boat load more to learn.  (insert smiley face here)

Here I go again throwing out a cliche'.  If I could walk a mile in your moccasins then I could probably come one step closer to understanding what you perceive as respect.  Pardon the pun. 

Respect and perception go hand in hand.  If I care enough about you to give you any amount of respect, I better have enough heart to put a bit of thought into it and give you the right kind of respect.  To do one without the other is thoughtless.

I have a few regrets.  The goofy part is that these regrets are about respect.  I have respect for a couple of individuals that I have offended over the years, but they didn't know because I didn't take into account how they might have perceived the respect that I have for them.  I wish there was a twelve step program for people like me.  Hell, I don't even think they have a name for the medical condition I have.  That's supposed to be a joke.  (insert laugh here)

See you next time.